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- Yearbook -
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Monday, November 06, 2006
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The yearbook; a gateway
Into a world that was left behind
That can't be entered again
But can be looked upon from the sidelines
As we wish and wish and wish and wish
That time could be turned back.
The memories flash by
Those that are mine and those that are not
Those belonging to people I know now
And love now
How I wish time could be changed
So I could spend more time
More happiness, more laughter
With the people I know now
But did not then.
The realization that nothing is in my hands
The frustration the sadness the madness
Time is evil cruel mean horrid
Fated.
What about those that I've always loved
What about the fact that we cannot be one
Forever and ever more
Because of time time time time.
Time that’s not ours but its own
That has its own rhythm and goes against our wishes
Crawling joyously when we want it to go fast
Cruelly shortening our moments of joy
Doing everything possible
To make our lives miserable.
As the heart grows heavy with feelings
And the mind is filled with memories
I retreat from that world
The one I'd been watching from afar
Wistfulness and envy at its peak
Sadness and longing no less
I close that gateway and come back to reality
Put away the magic' those memories
An innocence and uncomplicatedness now gone
I put it somewhere nearby
Where it will keep reminding me of the joyful days I once had
The love the laughter the joy the magic
It's only hope that will never be lost
the day i took out the sec 4 rg yearbook and went through it again. man, i miss rg. life was so fun. nothing to worry about except for getting a 2.8 so i can enter the best college in the country -.- thats it!
and now, it's like the weight of the world's upon me and i'm gonna sink into this swamp of a life any moment.
"there's gotta be more to life..."
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- another walk down memory lane -
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Walking into those memories
A world inhabited so long ago
Where we grew up
From little girls into young ladies
To be the daughters of a better age
Sisters in learning and sisters at heart
Bound together so strongly,
No wind can tear us apart.
Even time stopped for us
When our wills were strong
With the desire to relive those days
Almost everything in place
Like we entered another world
It was the same place
But one uninhabited, and where time had no meaning
Because time is the one always to blame
A stillness, a calmness
The silence, like it was all ours
For those few precious moments
We could spare from our busy lives
To go back in time
And cleanse the soul and mind
Tears flew anew, hearts bled afresh
Going there again, what did we hope to find?
Time never waits, it ticks on ceaselessly
Every moment in time we move further away
From this innocence, its joy
Move slowly into another world
Where time has moved on, people have moved on
Things will never be the same again
And I sit and wonder
What am I, when those I love are gone.
for my best friends in the whole wide world :) natasha, aakriti and hiral. this was written the night after i came back from going out with them to rgs. we went there and the memories came rushing back. need i say more.
oh and they'll know: this is the sequel to the poem i wrote at the end of last year in the 4th term of our last year in rgs. that one was titled; "a walk down memory lane" =D
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- Shards of glass -
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The sheer power, the great force
In lifting up a piece of glass
Heavy as your heart yet fragile as a frail baby
Like the weight of the world when you hold it
Yet the moment you lift up your hands and throw the piece
With enormous force; both physical and emotional
The release it offers is breathtaking
The heaviness is gone, the silence shattered
The stillness disturbed, the emptiness battered
The ripple of the crash pervades the entire pond
The vastness of it, as though the breaking of a strong bond
The heart/glass; the heart of glass
Shattering into a billion pieces
Shards with the capacity to hurt
Shards that can cause bleed
Miniscule yet powerful
Shards that refract the sunlight
To give a plethora of hues
Colors from every corner of the world
Momentarily happiness seems bountiful
Beautiful yet deadly
A sight to behold
Power immutable
Those shards of glass, the pieces of a shattered heart
this poem's for hiral. =) the other day she wanted to break something made of glass, just to release those pent-up emotions; but couldn't because breaking something is such an "immature" thing to do. oh woe! the perceptions of the society! how they bind us so tight there's no space left to breathe.
for you, hiral.
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- Nature's wrath -
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A storm of sadness
That crashes upon you like an ocean at high tide
The waves lapping fiercely against the shore
Swallowing up elaborate sandcastles and innocent living creatures
Engulfing them in its cold, gorging depths
To consume them completely
Surrounding them with a coldness and a darkness
Slowly and torturously, they’re swept away
Where the wind howls and the raindrops pelt hard
A hurricane arrives and a tornado wrecks everything in sight
Nature at its most ferocious
The sheer force that causes fear even in the strongest of beings
And makes them bow to Her
Like the humblest of bees
That give in to their Queen
extensive imagery here haha. go figure.
generally just about how when you're sad everything's just SO SAD that you really really can't do anything about it but give into the sadness completely.
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- Apathy -
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When there's absolutely nothing that drives you
and the going is all gone
When everything looks different; harsh and cold
and you can't hear that familiar old tinkle of everything going right
When you can't smell the freshness in the air around you
and nothing you touch moves you enough to make you feel alive
When you're just so apathetic you feel soul-dead
and the indifference gets to your nerves and you still can't do a thing
When you just feel so helpless and useless
and all you stood for is lost, hidden somewhere far, far away
When the situation is so sad you don’t even feel angry
and there's just NO EMOTIONS
When you're too drained to swap away that persistent moth meandering around you
and the keyboard seems to collect dust while you watch it stagnating with regret
When you know you ought to rage, storm and curse
and it's simply so sad that you can't even utter a word
When even your eyes are so exhausted that no tears flow
and life is so meaningless you just want to let it go
I like this poem...at that time I was very very depressed, maybe because I hadn't written in a long time and couldn't figure out what to write about either...can't really remember. either ways, after venting out my frustration through this rambling, it felt SO GOOD.
omg, who invented words?? I love him/her!! Where would I be if I couldn't write and let it all out!!
(i think someone i know might feel this poem appropriate to certain times they've had..)
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- Doomsday -
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A heaviness hangs in the air
A hush falls as the papers rustle
The Devil’s servants enlarge and shrink, enlarge and shrink
With barely suppressed glee
Evil laughter can be heard
As if from afar, the Land of Torture where they reside
The whole room seems to be a blur
It’s spinning around, spinning so fast
I’m afraid I'm about to lose control
I clutch onto my chair
Hang on for dear life
My knuckles go white
With the effort to stop every nerve from shaking and bursting apart
While my head starts spinning like a crazy top
Somewhere far far away I hear my name being called
Sounds as though from the mouth of a sinister demon
I walk with heavy footsteps to my dreadful doom
Careful not to let my hammering heart break free from my rib cage
So it doesn’t fall out and kill me
Slow, lingering steps, 'cause each one gets me closer to the moment
The moment of Revelation
The moment I could have put off forever
The moment I could have really done without
The moment that's inevitable
The moment of Revelation
When it comes, my heart skips a beat
I wait for the beating to resume-
There's nothing there
this one was quite funny. i wrote the first line intending to write about the recent haze problem in s'pore. it became an getting-back-exam-marks poem. i wonder why -.- lol.
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- i'm alive! -
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HELLO!
ok string of poems coming up, since i'm being practically sreamed at tp update this thing.
stuff i've written recently but haven't posted...
here goes...enjoy!
p.s. half of them are probably just random nonsense lol. but whatever. =)
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